Things I Think I Want
1. Baby Sloth - not a grown one I don't think b/c they are all rapey and weird....and I feel like they will smell quite bad.
2. A Car/Drivers Licence - the reality is this would be awesome and terrible all at once. I could not afford the upkeep without wandering down to Rock Bay Ave a few times a week to turn tricks for gas and oil change money.
3. A Grand Baby - I want this but not yet....A. is not done adventuring or doing stuff yet b/c we all know once you have kids you may as well be in a wheelchair in a lot of ways.
4. My Family to All Live In My Town - that's right I want all the aunties and the cousins and the siblings and the everyone to live in the same town as me....for real. And Connie & family....all in one place....and Adele & family...
5. A Live In Chef - if Oprah can have one why can't I? Can you imagine breakfast ready for you in the AM? Dinner ready when you get home...? and not friggin tomato soup, real healthy, delicious meals...fml.
6. A Personal Trainer - one with a Psychology PhD b/c I require intensive counselling/psychotherapy as well as a buttload of exercise and my mental self and physical self are at odds with each other. This trainer should also be a medical doctor b/c i cannot seem to move off the couch without injuring myself.
7. A Faster Metabolism - enough said.
8. Weird-O Room - one room for just my weird awesome things...instead of my desk area and bedroom and living room littered with a spattering of stuff so it just kind of looks like a 14 year old decorated.
9. Lottery Win - I would quit my job so fast I would probably injure myself getting off the couch. But seriously....10K a month, I could put A. through school and still live a good life and HELL YEAH I would move out of the ghetto Gorge into a different pool bldg...and oh shit yeah I could buy A. a car and she could be my little errand helper girl.....fml that would rule.
10. Musicians on the Payroll - once a month I would have Ryan McMahon come over and play for a few hours, we would chat and joke around, he would dabble with new songs....play old favorites...I would even invite Kim and Keith over...and Donna...Donna would be in a bubble though so she would not be affected by cat dander and die...the thought of Donna in a bubble in my living room is funny b/c the cat would try to get in there so bad....and she would be panicking.
11. A Pet Squirrel - as long as it wouldn't bite me or eat the wires in my house...maybe a herd of them actually...but they would crap outdoors.
12. Sprog Homeward Bound - gawdddddd, come home already kid...dying here!
THE END.
2. A Car/Drivers Licence - the reality is this would be awesome and terrible all at once. I could not afford the upkeep without wandering down to Rock Bay Ave a few times a week to turn tricks for gas and oil change money.3. A Grand Baby - I want this but not yet....A. is not done adventuring or doing stuff yet b/c we all know once you have kids you may as well be in a wheelchair in a lot of ways.
5. A Live In Chef - if Oprah can have one why can't I? Can you imagine breakfast ready for you in the AM? Dinner ready when you get home...? and not friggin tomato soup, real healthy, delicious meals...fml.
6. A Personal Trainer - one with a Psychology PhD b/c I require intensive counselling/psychotherapy as well as a buttload of exercise and my mental self and physical self are at odds with each other. This trainer should also be a medical doctor b/c i cannot seem to move off the couch without injuring myself.7. A Faster Metabolism - enough said.
8. Weird-O Room - one room for just my weird awesome things...instead of my desk area and bedroom and living room littered with a spattering of stuff so it just kind of looks like a 14 year old decorated.
9. Lottery Win - I would quit my job so fast I would probably injure myself getting off the couch. But seriously....10K a month, I could put A. through school and still live a good life and HELL YEAH I would move out of the ghetto Gorge into a different pool bldg...and oh shit yeah I could buy A. a car and she could be my little errand helper girl.....fml that would rule.10. Musicians on the Payroll - once a month I would have Ryan McMahon come over and play for a few hours, we would chat and joke around, he would dabble with new songs....play old favorites...I would even invite Kim and Keith over...and Donna...Donna would be in a bubble though so she would not be affected by cat dander and die...the thought of Donna in a bubble in my living room is funny b/c the cat would try to get in there so bad....and she would be panicking.11. A Pet Squirrel - as long as it wouldn't bite me or eat the wires in my house...maybe a herd of them actually...but they would crap outdoors.12. Sprog Homeward Bound - gawdddddd, come home already kid...dying here!THE END.